Lost in Dreams

I have finally figured out that I am a dreamer. My head is always in the clouds. I am okay with that also. I cant punctuate but i wish i could. I love to journal it is great therapy. I have started a new journey in my life. I have been going to CSCC for two semester but my heart hasn't been in it. As of summer 09 i should be taking one class hopefully online. I met with my adviser for the first time and i am 74 credit hours away from my Radiology degree. I have a lot of hard classes ahead of me. I am determined to make it. I love my job working at Bocelli but it is not my career. I want to work and love my job and be satisfied. I love my job now but i am not tottally satisfied i feel stuck more than anything. God has shown me a lot in the past few months. It took me so long to figure out that i cant do everything. I have to rely on Him and that was a hard lesson to learn. He has helped me give up so much anger and grudges. I am learning to live in a Christ like way and i love it! I have beaten so many habbits and addictions> It is amazing when you turn your eyes away from the world and focus on God everything is so much better and easier. I have learned so much about reality from a young age and i will not let that get me down. I lost my dad when i was 15 and to me i thought life would never go on...but it does ! I promise! Forever i held a grudge against God and kept asking why dad ? why did he have to go? i need him? but now i know i have learned so much from that experience. I know my dad is in heaven and is not in pain anymore. I have a tattoo on my wrist that says "Apple of my Eye" it is a constant reminder of the love he had for me. anytime i get down and start feeling upset i read Gods word and look at my wrist and i know everything will be okay. God gives me strength. It still amazes me to this day that One man gave his life for the sin of the world ...for me! I dont think my mind will ever wrap around the splendor of Christ but i thrive to be a light and lead others to Him. I always thought if i played church no one would doubt me and i was wrong. I have such a strong church. Bro. Jonos preachings bring me to my knees and remind me why i am here on Earth. I am not here for a good career family friends and social acceptance. I am here to lead others to Him. This place is not my home my home is sitting in heaven with God praising him for the rest of eternity.!!!!!